CATS Comprehensive Lyrics Music by Andrew Lloyd Webber Lyrics from: "Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats", "The Queen's Book of the Red Cross", unpublished "Mr. Eliot's Book of Pollicle Dogs and Jellicle Cats as Recited to Him by the Man in White Spats", and other unpublished poems by Thomas Stearns Eliot Additional lyrics written by Trevor Nunn and Richard Stilgoe ===================================ACT 1======================================= ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [1] Overtude 2:26 (track timing from The Really Useful Company's CD) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [2] Prologue: Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats 5:13 * Midnight. Not a sound from the pavement. * Suddenly an explosion of lights and music fills the theatre, revealing * a larger-than-life junkyard. Probing car lights tear across the * darkened landscape of bottles and boxes, briefly catching the darting * image of a running feline. * One by one, the curious cats emerge. Tonight is the one special night * each year when the tribe of Jellicle Cats reunites to celebrate who * they are. The cats emerge singing of their unique abilities and special * traits in a fusion of poetry and dance. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Are you blind when you're born? Can you see in the dark? Can you look at a king? Would you sit on his throne? Can you say of your bite that it's worse than your bark? Are you cock of the walk when you're walking alone? Because Jellicles are and Jellicles do, Jellicles do and Jellicles would, Jellicles would and Jellicles can, Jellicles can and Jellicles do. When you fall on your head, do you land on your feet? Are you tense when you sense there's a storm in the air? Can you find your way blind when you're lost in the street? Do you know how to go to the Heaviside Layer? Because Jellicles can and Jellicles do, Jellicles do and Jellicles can, Jellicles can and Jellicles do, Jellicles do and Jellicles can, Jellicles can and Jellicles do. Can you ride on a broomstick to places far distant? Familiar with candle, with book, and with bell? Were you Whittington's friend? The Pied Piper's assistant? Have you been an alumnus of heaven and hell? Are you mean like a minx? Are you lean like a lynx? Are you keen to be seen when you're smelling a rat? Were you there when the Pharoahs commissioned the Sphinx? If you were, and you are, you're a Jellicle Cat! Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats, Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats, Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats, Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats, Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats. We can dive through the air like a flying trapeze, We can turn double somersaults, bounce on a tire, We can run up a wall, we can swing through the trees, We can balance on bars, we can walk on a wire. Jellicles can and Jellicles do, Jellicles can and Jellicles do, Jellicles can and Jellicles do, Jellicles can and Jellicles do, Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats, Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats, Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats, Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats. Can you sing at the same time in more than one key? Duets by Rossini and waltzes by Strauss? And can you (as Cats do) begin with a 'C'? That always triumphantly brings down the house? Jellicle Cats are queens of the night Singing at astronomical height: Handling pieces from the Messiah, Hallelujah, angelical Choir. The mystical divinity of unashamed felinity Round the cathedral rang Vivat Life to the everlasting Cat! Feline, fearless, faithful and true To others who do - What Jellicles do and Jellicles can Jellicles can and Jellicles do Jellicle Cats sing Jellicle chants Jellicles old and Jellicles new Jellicle song and Jellicle dance Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats Practical Cats, Dramatical Cats Pragmatical Cats, Fanatical Cats Oratorical Cats, Delphicoracle Cats Skeptical Cats, Dispeptical Cats Romantical Cats, Pedantical Cats Critical Cats, Parasitical Cats Allegorical Cats, Metaphorical Cats Statistical Cats and Mystical Cats Political Cats, Hypocritical Cats Clerical Cats, Hysterical Cats Cynical Cats, Rabbinical Cats Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats Jellicles dance and Jellicles sing Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats Jellicle song and Jellicles sing Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats Jellicle songs for Jellicle Cats * But the cats are not alone. Humans (the audience) are present in the * cats' private world. The cats are at first reluctant and suspicious to * include others in their domain. There's a man over there with a look of surprise As much as to say well now how about that? Do I actually see with my own very eyes A man who's not heard of a Jellicle Cat? What's a Jellicle cat? What's a Jellicle Cat? What's a Jellicle Cat? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [3] The Naming of Cats 2:19 * They are proud, however, and they explain to their human visitors who * they are and reveal that cats have three different names: the one the * family uses daily, the more dignified name and a secret name. It is * the cat's contemplation of the latter that keeps felines in deep * thought. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Naming of Cats is a difficult matter, It isn't just one of your holiday games; You may think at first I'm as mad as a hatter When I tell you, a cat must have three different names. First of all, there's the name that the family use daily, Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo or James, Such as Victor or Jonathan, George or Bill Bailey - All of them sensible everyday names. There are fancier names if you think they sound sweeter, Some for the gentlemen, some for the dames: Such as Plato, Admetus, Electra, Demeter - But all of them sensible everyday names. But I tell you, a cat needs a name that's particular, A name that's peculiar, and more dignified, Else how can he keep up his tail perpendicular, Or spread out his whiskers, or cherish his pride? Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum, Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo, or Coricopat, Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum - Names that never belong to more than one cat. But above and beyond there's still one name left over, And that is the name that you never will guess; The name that no human research can discover - But the cat himself knows, and will never confess. When you notice a cat in profound meditation, The reason, I tell you, is always the same: His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name: His ineffable effable Effanineffable Deep and inscrutable singular Name. Name, name, name, name, name, name... ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [4] The Invitation to the Jellicle Ball 2:13 * The young and innocent white cat Victoria performs a solo dance. * Munkustrap, a large grey tabby who serves as the show's narrator, * explains that the Jellicle Cats meet once a year to rejoice! He also * explains that they are waiting for their leader, the wise Old * Deuteronomy, who will choose which one of the Jellicle Cats will this * year journey to the Heavyside Layer to be reborn to a new life! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Jellicle Cats come out to-night Jellicle Cats come one come all: The Jellicle Moon is shining bright - Jellicles come to the Jellicle Ball. Jellicle Cats come out to-night Jellicles Come to the Jellicle Ball! Jellicle Cats are white and black, Jellicle Cats are of moderate size; Jellicles jump like a jumping-jack, Jellicle Cats have moonlit eyes. We're quiet enough in the morning hours, We're quiet enough in the afternoon, Reserving our terpsichorean powers To dance by the light of the Jellicle Moon. Jellicle Cats meet once a year At the Jellicle Ball where we all rejoice! And the Jellicle Leader will soon appear And make what is known as the Jellicle Choice. When Old Deuteronomy just before dawn Through a silence you feel you could cut with a knife Announces the Cat who can now be reborn And come back to a different Jellicle Life. For waiting up there is the Heaviside Layer Full of wonders one Jellicle only will see And Jellicles ask because Jellicles dare: Who will it be? Who will it be? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [5] The Old Gumbie Cat 3:40 * From this point onward, each of the cats tells his own story in song * and dance, hoping to be chosen as the special cat to come back to a * different Jellicle life. * Munkustrap introduces Jennyanydots who sleeps and lounges all day * long. But at night, she becomes a super-active nanny. She instructs * the mice in music and crochet work, and keeps the cockroaches busy. * The cats take this opportunity to dress up with Jenny and perform an * exuberant tap dance. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I have a Gumbie Cat in mind, her name is Jennyanydots; Her coat is of the tabby kind, with tiger stripes and leopard spots. All day she sits upon the stair or on the step or on the mat: She sits and sits and sits and sits - and that's what makes a gumbie cat! That's what makes a Gumbie Cat. But when the day's hustle and bustle is done, Then the Gumbie Cat's work is but hardly begun. And when all the family's in bed and asleep, She tucks up her skirts to the basement to creep. //She slips down the stairs to the basement to creep. She is deeply concerned with the ways of the mice - Their behavior's not good and their manners not nice; So when she has got them lined up on the matting, She teaches them music, crocheting and tatting. I have a Gumbie Cat in mind, her name is Jennyanydots; Her equal would be hard to find, she likes the warm and sunny spots. All day she sits beside the hearth or on the bed or on my hat: She sits and sits and sits and sits - and that's what makes a Gumbie Cat! That's what makes a Gumbie Cat. But when the day's hustle and bustle is done, Then the Gumbie Cat's work is but hardly begun. And she finds that the mice will not ever be quiet, She is sure it is due to irregular diet And believing that nothing is done without trying, She says right to work with her baking and frying. She makes them a mouse-cake of bread and dried peas, And a beautiful fry of lean bacon and cheese. I have a Gumbie Cat in mind, her name is Jennyanydots; The curtain-cord she likes to wind, and tie it into sailor-knots. She sits upon the window-sill, or anything that's smooth and flat: She sits and sits and sits and sits - and that's what makes a Gumbie Cat! That's what makes a Gumbie Cat But when the day's hustle and bustle is done, Then the Gumbie Cat's work is but hardly begun. She thinks that the cockroaches just need employment To prevent them from idle and wanton destroyment. So she's formed, from that lot of disorderly louts, A troop of well-disciplined helpful boy-scouts, With a purpose in life and a good deed to do - And she's even created a Beetles' Tattoo! So for Old Gumbie Cat let us now give three cheers - On whom well-ordered households depend, it appears. Three cheers, three cheers, three cheers For she's a jolly good fellow! Thank you my dears! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [6] The Rum Tum Tugger 3:06 * The second cat we are introduced to is "The Rum Tum Tugger," a playful * prankster that the female cats find extremely attractive. Tugger * explains how fussy he can be: he wants what he doesn't have, and * doesn't want what's offered to him. The one thing that he does enjoy * is being the center of attention, which he is throughout the number. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Rum Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat: If you offer me pheasant I'd rather have grouse. If you put me in a house I would much prefer a flat, If you put me in a flat then I only wanna house. If you set me on a mouse then I only wanna rat, If you set me on a rat then I'd rather chase a mouse. The Rum Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat - And there isn't any call for me to shout it: For he will do As he do do And there's no doing anything about it! The Rum Tum Tugger is a terrible bore: When you let me in, then I wanna go out; I'm always on the wrong side of every door, As soon as I'm at home, then I'd like to get about. I like to lie in the bureau drawer, But I make such a fuss if I can't get out. The Rum Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat - And there isn't any use for you to doubt it: For he will do As he do do And there's no doing anything about it! The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious beast: My disobliging ways are a matter of habit. If you offer me fish then I only want a feast; When there isn't any fish then I won't eat rabbit. If you offer me cream then I sniff and sneer, For I only like what I find for myself; So you'll catch me in it right up to my ears, If you put it away on the larder shelf! The Rum Tum Tugger is artful and knowing, The Rum Tum Tugger doesn't care for a cuddle; But I'll leap on your lap in the middle of your sewing, For there's nothing I enjoy like a horrible muddle. The Rum Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat, The Rum Tum Tugger doesn't care for a cuddle The Rum Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat - And there isn't any need for me to spout it: For he will do As he do do And there's no doing anything about it! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [7] Grizabella 2:26 * The evening takes a somber turn when the outcast figure "Grizabella, * The Glamour Cat" appears. Although she is a Jellicle Cat, the rest of * the tribe shun her. She had left the tribe years ago to explore the * outside world. The outside world has been hard on her, however, and * she who was once a beautiful and glamorous feline is now tattered and * torn. Although she wants to return, the other cats are cruel, clawing * and hissing at her. But Grizabella is proud, and she vows to return. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Remark the Cat who hesitates towards you In the light of the door which opens on her like a grin You see the border of her coat is torn and stained with sand And you see the corner of her eye twists like a crooked pin She haunted many a low resort Near the grimy road of Tottenham Court She flitted about the No Man's Land From 'The Rising Sun' to 'The Friend at Hand' And the postman sighed as he scratched his head 'You'd really had thought she ought to be dead' And who would ever suppose that that Was Grizabella, the Glamour Cat? Grizabella, the Glamour Cat, Grizabella, the Glamour Cat Who'd had ever suppose that that Was Grizabella, the Glamour Cat? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [8] Bustopher Jones 4:24 * The next cat to join the proceedings is the hefty "Bustopher Jones." A * large "twenty-five pounder," always clad in his signature white spats, * Bustopher spends his time eating, eating and eating in one of the many * English pubs and clubs that he frequents. Jennyanydots is quite * besauntered with him, and helps sing his praises. He responds, to her * great delight, by kissing her hand. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Bustopher Jones is not skin and bones - In fact, he's remarkably fat. He doesn't haunt pubs - he has eight or nine clubs, For he's the St. James Street Cat! He's the Cat we all greet as he walks down the street In his coat of fastidious black: No commonplace mousers have such well-cut trousers Or such an impeccable back. In the whole of St. James's the smartest of names is The name of this Brummell of Cats; And we're all of us proud to be nodded or bowed to By Bustopher Jones in white spats! In the whole of St. James's the smartest of names is The name of this Brummell of cats And we're all of us proud to be nodded or bowed to By Bustopher Jones in white spats. My visits are occasional to the Senior Educational And it is against the rules For any one Cat to belong both to that And the Joint Superior Schools. For a similar reason, when game is in season I am found, not at Fox's, but Blimp's; I am frequently seen at the gay Stage and Screen Which is famous for winkles and shrimps. In the season of venison I keep my ben'son To the Pothunter's succulent bones; And just before noon's not a moment to soon To drop in for a drink at the Drones. When I'm seen in a hurry there's probably curry At the Siamese - or at the Glutton; If I look full of gloom then I've lunched at the Tomb On cabbage, rice pudding and mutton. In the whole of St. James's the smartest of names is The name of this Brummell of cats And we're all of us proud to be nodded or bowed to By Bustopher Jones in white By Bustopher Jones in white By Bustopher Jones in white spats So, much in this way, passes Bustopher's day - At one club or another he's found. It can be no surprise that under our eyes He has grown unmistakably round. He's a twenty-five pounder, or I am a bounder, And he's putting on weight every day: But I'm so well preserved because I've observed All my life a routine, and I'd say I am still in my prime, I shall last out my time That's the word from this stoutest of Cats It must and it shall be Spring in Pall Mall While Bustopher Jones wears white Bustopher Jones wears white Bustopher Jones wears white spats! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [9] Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer 3:50 * Suddenly there is a thunderous crash, followed by the sound of police * sirens and flashing red lights. The villainous cat Macavity is on the * loose! The cats scatter, leaving an empty stage. * Two off-stage giggles signal the entrance of Mungojerrie and * Rumpleteazer, a fun-loving, frolicking team of pranksters, always * getting in trouble with the family with whom they live. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Macavity! Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer we're a notorious couple of cats. As knockabout clowns, quick-change comedians, Tight-rope walkers and acrobats We have an extensive reputation. We make our home in Victoria Grove - That is merely a center of our operation, For we are incurable given to rove. We are very well know in Cornwall Gardens, In Launceston Place and in Kensington Square - We have really a little more reputation Than a couple of cats can very well bear. If the area window was found ajar And the basement looks like a field of war, If a tile or two comes loose on the roof, Which presently fails to be waterproof, //Which presently ceased to be waterproof, If the drawers are pulled out from bedroom chests, And you can't find one of your winter vests, If after supper one of the girls Suddenly missed her Woolworth pearls: Then the family will say: 'It's that horrible cat! But was it Mungojerrie - or Rumpleteazer?' - And most of the time they leave it at that. Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer have an very unusual gift of the gab. We are highly efficient cat-burgulars as well, And remarkably smart at a smash-and-grab. We make our home in Victoria Grove. We have no regular occupation. We are plausible fellows, who like to engage A friendly policeman in conversation. When the family assembles for Sunday dinner, With their minds made up that they wouldn't get thinner On Argentine joint, potatoes and greens, Then the cook would appear from behind the scenes And say in a voice that is broken with sorrow: 'I'm afraid you must wait and have dinner tomorrow! For the joint has gone from the oven - like that!' Then the family will say: 'It's that horrible cat! But was it Mungojerrie - or Rumpleteazer?' - And most of the time they leave it at that. Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer have a wonderful way of working together. And some of the time you would say it was luck, And some of the time you would say it was weather. We go through the house like a hurricane, And no sober person could take his oath Was it Mungojerrie - or Rumpleteazer? Or could you have sworn that it mightn't be both? And when you hear a dining-room smash Or up from the pantry there comes a loud crash Or down from the library comes a loud ping From a vase which was commonly said to be Ming - The family will say: 'Now which was which cat? It was Mungojerrie! And Rumpleteazer!' - And there's nothing at all to be done about that! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [10] Old Deuteronomy 4:24 * The entire tribe rejoins as their benevolent and wise leader Old * Deuteronomy arrives. The cats adore and respect him. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Old Deuteronomy's lived a long time; He's a Cat who has lived many lives in succession. He was famous in proverb and famous in rhyme A long while before Queen Victoria's accession. Old Deuteronomy's buried nine wives And more - I am tempted to say, ninety-nine; And his numerous progeny prospers and thrives And the village is proud of him in his decline. At the sight of that placid and bland physiognomy, As he sits in the sun on the vicarage wall, The Oldest Inhabitant croaks: 'Well, of all... Things... Can it be.. really!... Yes!... No!... Ho! hi! Oh my eye! My mind may be wandering but I confess // My sight may be failing, but yet I confess I believe it is Old Deuteronomy!' Old Deutoronomy sits in the street, He sits in the High Street on market day; The bullocks may bellow, the sheep they may bleat, But the dogs and the herdsmen will turn them away. The cars and the lorries run over the kerb, And the villagers put up a notice: Road Closed - So that nothing untoward may chance to disturb Deutoronomy's rest when he feels so disposed Or when he's engaged in domestic economy: And the Oldest Inhabitant croaks: 'Well, of all... Things... Can it be.. really!... Yes!... No!... Ho! hi! Oh my eye! I'm deaf of an ear now, but yet I can guess That the cause of the trouble is Old Deutoronomy!' Old Deutoronomy lies on the floor Of the Fox and French Horn for his afternoon sleep; And then the men say: 'There's just time for one more,' Then the landlady from her back parlour will peep And say: 'Now then, out you go, by the back door, For Old Deutoronomy mustn't be woken - I'll have the police if there's any uproar' - And out they all shuffle, without a word spoken. The digestive repose of that feline's gastronomy Must never be broken whatever befall: And the Oldest Inhabitant croaks: 'Well, of all... Things... Can it be.. really!... Yes!... No!... Ho! hi! Oh my eye! My mind may be wandering but I confess I believe it is Old Deuteronomy!' Well, of all... Things... Can it be.. really!... Yes!... No!... Ho! hi! Oh my eye! My mind may be wandering but I confess I believe it is Old Deuteronomy! Well, of all... Things... Can it be.. really!... Yes!... No!... Ho! hi! Oh my eye! My legs may be tottery, I must go slow And be careful of Old Deuteronomy!' ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [] The Pekes and the Pollicles * Munkustrap has assembled some entertainment for Deuteronomy. The cats * put on a show called "The Awful Battle of the Pekes and the Pollicles * together with The Marching Song of the Pollicle Dogs." In the show, * which Munkustrap narrates, the cats dress up as two rival dog * factions: the Pekes and the Pollicles. The two groups bark ceaselessly * at each other, until they are frightened away by the great Rumpus Cat, * a sleek, powerful feline. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Jellicle Cats meet once a year On the night we make the Jellicle Choice And know, that the Jellicle Leader is here Jellicle Cats can all rejoice! Of the Awefull Battle of the Pekes and the Pollicles Together with some account of the participation Of the Pugs and the Poms, And the intervention of the Great Rumpuscat! The Pekes and the Pollicles, everyone knows, Are proud and implacable passionate foes; It is always the same, wherever one goes. And the Pugs and the Poms, although most people say That they do not like fighting, yet once in a way //That they do not like fighting, will often display They now and again join into the fray. //Every symptom of wanting to join in the fray. And they Bark bark bark bark Bark bark bark bark Until you can hear them all over the Park. Now on the occasion of which I shall speak Almost nothing had happened for nearly a week. (And that's a long time for a Pol or a Peke). The big Police Dog was away from his beat - I don't know the reason, but most people think He slipped into the Wellington's Arms for a drink - //He'd slipped into the Bricklayer's Arms for a drink - And no one at all was about on the street When a Peke and a Pollicle happened to meet. They did not advance, or exactly retreat, But they glared at each other, and they scraped their hind feet, And started to Bark bark bark bark Bark bark bark bark Until you could hear them all over the park And they Bark bark bark bark Bark bark bark bark Until you could hear them all over the park! Now the Peke, although people may say what they please, Is no British Dog, but a Heather Chinese. And so all the Pekes, when they heard the uproar, Some came to the window, some came to the door; There was surely a dozen, more likely a score. And together they started to grumble and wheeze In their huffery-snuffery Heather Chinese. But a terrible din is what Pollicles like, For your Pollicle Dog is a dour Yorkshire tyke, ------------------ * The Marching Song of the Pollicle Dogs There are dogs out of every nation The Irish, the Welsh, and the Dane The Russian, the Dutch, the Dalmatian, And even from China and Spain. The poodle, the Pom, the Alsatian, And the mastiff who walks on a chain And to those that are frisky and frolical Let my meaning be perfectly plain That my name it is Little Tom Pollicle And you'd better not do it again! ------------------ And his braw Scottish cousins are snappers and biters, And every dog-jack of them notable fighters; And so they stepped out, with their pipers in order, Playing When the Blue Bonnets Came Over the Border. Then the Pugs and the Poms held no longer aloof, But some from the balcony, some from the roof, Joined in To the din With a Bark bark bark bark Bark bark bark bark Untill you could hear them all over the Park! Huffery-snuffery Huffery-snuffery Huffery-snuffery Huffery-snuff Untill you could hear them all over the Park! Now when these bold heroes together assembled, The traffic all stopped, and the Underground trembled, And some of the neighbours were so much afraid That they started to ring up the Fire Brigade. When suddenly, up from a small basement flat, Why who should stalk out but the Great Rumpuscat. His eyes were like fireballs fearfully blazing, He gave a great yawn, and his jaws were amazing; And when he looked out through the bars of the area, You never saw anything fiercer or hairier. And what with the glare of his eyes and his yawning, The Pekes and the Pollicles quickly took warning. He looked at the sky and he gave a great leap - And they every last one of them scattered like sheep. And when the Police Dog returned to his beat, There wasn't a single one left in the street. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [11] The Jellicle Ball 7:14 * The action is intruded by yet another crash from the villainous * Macavity, which sends the cats scurrying! Old Deuteronomy soothes * them, as they come back one by one. It is time for "The Jellicle * Ball," the great yearly dance in which all of the cats celebrate! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Jellicle Cats and Dogs all must, Pollicle Dogs and Cats all must Like undertakers, come to dust! Macavity! Jellicle Cats come out to-night Jellicle Cats come one come all: The Jellicle Moon is shining bright - Jellicles come to the Jellicle Ball. Jellicle Cats are black and white, Jellicle Cats are rather small; Jellicle Cats are merry and bright, And pleasant to hear when we caterwaul. Jellicle Cats have cheerful faces, Jellicle Cats have bright black eyes; We like to practise our airs and graces And wait for the Jellicle Moon to rise. Jellicle Cats develop slowly, Jellicle Cats are not too big; Jellicle Cats are roly-poly, We know how to dance a gavotte and a jig. Until the Jellicle Moon appears We make our toilette and take our repose: Jellicles wash behind their ears, Jellicles dry between their toes. Jellicle Cats are white and black, Jellicle Cats are of moderate size; Jellicles jump like a jumping-jack, Jellicle Cats have moonlit eyes. We're quiet enough in the morning hours, We're quiet enough in the afternoon, Reserving our terpsichorean powers To dance by the light of the Jellicle Moon. Jellicle Cats are black and white, Jellicle Cats (as we said) are small; If it happens to be a stormy night We will practise a caper or two in the hall. If it happens the sun is shining bright You would say we had nothing to do at all: We are resting and saving ourselves to be right For the Jellicle Moon and the Jellicle Ball! Jellicle Cats come out to-night Jellicle Cats come one come all: The Jellicle Moon is shining bright - Jellicles come to the Jellicle Ball. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [12] Grizabella, the Glamour Cat 3:06 * Grizabella intrudes once more, wanting to rejoin her family and be a * part of the celebration. The cats again scorn her. She is left to * contemplate her "Memory" of the time before she left the tribe, when * she was once young, beautiful and happy. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- You see the border of her coat is torn and stained with sand And you see the corner of her eye twists like a crooked pin She haunted many a low resort Near the grimy road of Tottenham Court She flitted about the No Man's Land From 'The Rising Sun' to 'The Friend at Hand' And the postman sighed as he scratched his head 'You'd really had thought she ought to be dead' And who would ever suppose that That was Grizabella, the Glamour Cat Grizabella, the Glamour Cat, Grizabella, the Glamour Cat And who would ever suppose that That was Grizabella, the Glamour Cat ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [13] Memory 1:18 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Midnight Not a sound from the pavement Has the moon lost her memory She is smiling alone In the lamplight the withered leaves collect at my feet And the wind begins to moan Every street lamp seems to beat a fatalistic warning Someone mutters and the streetlamp gutters And soon it will be morning Memory All alone in the moonlight I can smile at the old days I was beautiful then I remember the time I knew what happiness was Let the memory live again * She yearns to be accepted, and she stretches out her hand behind her, * hoping another cat will touch her. It doesn't happen. She slinks off * into the night. ==================================ACT 2======================================== ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [1] The Moments of Happiness 3:36 * It's after the Jellicle Ball, and the cats are resting, contemplating * before they resume introducing more cats. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The moments of happiness We had the experience but missed the meaning And approach to the meaning restores the experience In a different form beyond any meaning We can assign to happiness The past experience revived in the meaning Is not the experience of one life only But of many generations Not forgetting something that is probably quite ineffable Moonlight Turn your face to the moonlight Let your memory lead you Open up, enter in If you find there the meaning of what happiness is Then a new life will begin Moonlight Turn your face to the moonlight Let your memory lead you Open up, enter in If you find there the meaning of what happiness is Then a new life will begin ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [2] Gus: the Theatre Cat 6:41 * "Gus The Theatre Cat" appears next. He's an aged stage actor suffering * from palsy, who worked with the greatest actors of his day. Gus tells of * his greatest theatrical triumphs, and yearns to do it again. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Gus is the Cat at the Theatre Door. His name, as I ought to have told you before, Is really Asparagus. But that's such a fuss To pronounce, that we usually call him just Gus. His coat's very shabby, he's thin as a rake, And he suffers from palsy that makes his paw shake. Yet he was, in his youth, quite the smartest of Cats - But no longer a terror to mice or to rats. For he isn't the Cat that he was in his prime; Though his name was quite famous, he says, in his time. And whenever he joins his friends at their club (Which takes place at the back of the neighboring pub) He loves to regale them, if someone else pays, With anecdotes drawn from his palmiest days. For he once was a Star of the highest degree - He has acted with Irving, he's acted with Tree. And he likes to relate his success on the Halls, Where the Gallery once gave him seven cat-calls. But his grandest creation, as he loves to tell, Was Firefrorefiddle, the Fiend of the Fell. I have played in my time every possible part, And I used to know seventy speeches by heart. I'd extemporize back-chat, I knew how to gag, And I knew how to let the cat out of the bag. I knew how to act with my back and my tail; With an hour of rehearsal, I never could fail. I'd a voice that would soften the hardest of hearts, Whether I took the lead, or in character parts. I have sat by the bedside of poor Little Nell; When the Curfew was rung, then I swung on the bell. In the Pantomime season I never fell flat And I once understudied Dick Whittington's Cat. But my grandest creation, as history will tell, was Firefrorefiddle, the Fiend of the Fell. And if someone will give him a toothful of gin, He will tell how he once played a part in East Lynne. At a Shakespeare performance he once walked on pat, When some actor suggested the need for a cat. And I say now, these kittens, they do not get trained As we did in the days when Victoria reigned. And they never get drilled in a regular troupe, And they think they are smart, just to jump through a hoop. And he says, as he scratches himself with his claws, Well, the Theatre is certainly not what is was. These modern productions, they're all very well, But there's nothing to equal, from what I hear tell, That moment of mystery When I made history As Firefrorefiddle, the Fiend of the Fell. I once crossed the stage on a telegraph wire, To rescue a child when the house was on fire. And I think that I still can, much better than most, Produce blood-curdling noises to bring on the Ghost. And I once played Growltiger - Could do it again, could do it again Could do it again ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [3] "Growltiger's Last Stand" including "The Ballad of Billy McCaw" 9:40 * In the fantasy sequence "Growltiger's Last Stand," Gus relives one * such triumph, playing the pirate Growltiger. In this sequence, * Growltiger, a feared feline sea captain and his amour, Griddlebone, * meet an untimely end after battling a crew of Siamese sailors. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Growltiger was a Bravo Cat who travelled on a barge: In fact he was the roughest cat that ever roamed at large. From Gravesend up to Oxford he pursued his evil aims, Rejoicing in his title of the 'Terror of the Thames'. His manners and appearance did not calculate to please; His coat was torn and seedy, it was baggy at the knees; One ear was somewhat missing, no need to tell you why, And he scowled upon a hostile world from one forbidding eye. The cottagers of Rotherhithe knew something of his fame; At Hammersmith and Putney people shuddered at his name. They would fortify the hen-house, lock up the silly goose, When the rumor ran along the shore: Growltiger's on the loose! Woe to the weak canary, that fluttered from its cage; Woe to the pampered Pekinese, that faced Growltiger's rage; Woe the bristly Bandicoot, that lurks on foreign ships, And woe to any Cat with whom Growltiger came to grips! But most to Cats of foreign race his hatred had been vowed; To Cats of foreign name and race, no quarter was allowed. The Persian and the Siamese regarded him with fear - Because it was the Siamese that mauled his missing ear. Now on a peaceful summer's night, all nature seemed at play, The tender moon was shining bright, the barge at Molesey lay. All in the balmy moonlight it lay rocking on the tide - And Growltiger was disposed to show his sentimental side. His bucko mate, Grumbuskin, long since had disappeared, For to the Bell at Hampton he had gone to wet his beard; And his bosun, Tumblebrutus, he too had stol'n away - In the yard behind the Lion he was prowling for his prey. In the forepeak of the vessel, Growltiger sate alone, Concentrating his attention on the Lady Griddlebone. And his raffish crew lay sleeping in their barrels and their bunks - As the Siamese came creeping in their sampans and their junks. Growltiger had no eye or ear for aught but Griddlebone. And the Lady seemed enraptured by his manly baritone, Disposed to relaxation, and awaiting no surprise - But the moonlight shone reflected from a thousand bright blue eyes. And closer still and closer the sampans circled 'round, And yet from all the enemy there was not heard a sound. The foe was armed with toasting forks and cruel carving knives - And the lovers sang their last duet, in danger of their lives. ----------------------- * this replaces The Ballad of Billy McCaw in some version * -In una tepida notte d'estate, allorche la natura -Era nel pieno fulgore, e la resca rugiada -Splendeva al chiar di luna sopra la verzura -Si poteva vedere il galeone ancorato -Oscillare in silenzio nel vento profumato -Dalla marea del naviglio serenamente cullato -In quella tepida notte che c'e dunque di male -Se in tnata poesia anche il pirata divento sentimentale? -Oscillare in silenzio nel vento profumato -Dalla marea do naviglio serenamente cullato -In quella tepida notte -In quella tepida notte -In quella tepida notte ------------------------ ------------------------ * The Ballad of Billy McCaw +Oh, how well I remember the old Bull and Bush +Where we used to go down of a Sattaday night, +Where, when anything happened, it came with a rush, +For the boss, Mr. Clark, he was very polite; +A very nice house, from basement to garret +A very nice house. Ah, but it was the parret, +The parret, the parret named Billy M'Caw, +Who brought all those folk to the bar. +Ah! He was the life of the bar. +Of a Sattaday night, we was all feeling bright, +And Lily LaRose, the barmaid that was, +She'd say 'Billy! Billy M'Caw! Come give us, +Come give us a dance on the bar.' +And Billy would dance on the bar, and Billy would dance on the bar. +And then we'd feel balmy, in each eye a tear, +And emotion would make us all order more beer. +Lily, she was a girl what had brains in her head; +She wouldn't have nothick, no not that much said. +If it came to an argument, or a dispute, +She would settle it offhand with the toe of her boot +Or as likely as not put her fist through your eye. +But when we was happy and just a bit dry, +Or when we was thirsty, and just a bit sad, +She would rap on the bar with that corkscrew she had +And say 'Billy! Billy M'Caw! +Come give us a tune on your pastoral flute!' +And Billy'd strike up on his pastoral flute, +And Billy'd strike up on his pastoral flute. +And then we'd feel balmy, in each eye a tear, +And emotion would make us all order more beer. +'Billy! Billy M'Caw! +Come give us a tune on your moley guitar!' +And Billy'd strike up on his moley guitar, +And Billy'd strike up on his moley guitar. +And then we'd feel balmy, in each eye a tear, +And emotion would make us all order more beer. +'Billy! Billy M'Caw! +Come give us a tune on your moley guitar!' +Ah! He was the life of the bar. * End of Ballad of Billy M'Caw ------------------------ Then Gilbert gave the signal to his fierce Mongolian horde; With a frightful burst of fireworks, the Chinks they swarmed aboard //Abandoning their sampans, the Chinks they swarmed aboard Abandoning their sampans, and their pullaways and junks, They battened down the hatches on the crew within their bunks. Then Griddlebone she gave a screech, for she was badly skeered; I am sorry to admit it, but she quickly disappeared. She probably escaped with ease, I'm sure she was not drowned - But a serried ring of flashing steel Growltiger did surround. The ruthless foe pressed forward, in stubborn rank on rank; Growltiger to his vast surprise was forced to walk the plank. He who a hundred victims had driven to that drop, As the end of all his crimes was forced to go ker-flip, ker-flop. Oh there was joy in Wapping when the news flew through the land; At Maidenhead and Henley there was dancing on the strand. Rats were roasted whole in Brentford, and Victoria Dock, And a day of celebration was commanded in Bangkok! * End of Growtiger's Last Stand ------------------------ These modern productions are all very well, But there's nothing to equal, from what I hear tell, That moment of mystery When I made history... * End of Gus the Theatre Cat ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [4] Skimbleshanks, the Railway Cat 4:43 * We are pulled back to the present as "Skimbleshanks The Railway Cat" * introduces himself. A friendly uncle to all of the cats, Skimbleshanks * attends the trains he rides, and makes sure every detail is perfect. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat, the Cat of the Railway Train! There's a whisper down the line at eleven thirty-nine When the Night Mail's ready to depart, Saying, 'Skimble where is Skimble has he gone to hunt the thimble? We must find him or the train can't start.' All the guards and all the porters and the stationmaster's daughters Would be searching high and low, Saying 'Skimble where is Skimble for unless he's very nimble Then the Night Mail just can't go.' At eleven forty-two with the signal overdue And the passengers all frantic to a man - That's when I would appear and I'd saunter to the rear: I'd been busy in the luggage van! Then he gave one flash of his glass-green eyes And the signal went 'All clear!' They'd be off at last to the northern part Of the Northern Hemisphere! Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat, the Cat of the Railway Train! You could say that by and large it was me who was in charge Of the Sleeping Car express. From the driver and the guards to the bagmen playing cards I would supervise them all, more or less. Down the corridor he paces and examines all the faces Of the travellers in the First and the Third; He established control by a regular patrol And he'd know at once if anything occurred. He would watch you without winking and he knows what you were thinking And it's certain that he didn't approve Of hilarity and riot, so that folk were very quiet When Skimble was about and on the move. You could play no pranks with Skimbleshanks! He's a Cat that cannot be ignored; So nothing went wrong on the Northern Mail When Skimbleshanks was aboard It was very pleasant when they'd found their little den With their name written up on the door. And the berth was very neat with a newly folded sheet on And not a speck of dust on the floor. There was every sort of light - you could make it dark or bright; And a button you could turn to make a breeze. And a funny little basin you're supposed to wash your face in And a crank to shut the window should you sneeze. Then the guard looked in politely and would ask you very brightly 'Do you like your morning tea weak or strong?' But I just behind him and was ready to remind him, For Skimble won't let anything go wrong. When they crept into their cozy berths And pulled up the counterpane, They ought to reflect that it was very nice To know that they wouldn't be bothered by mice - They can leave all that to the Railway Cat, The Cat of the Railway Train! Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat, the Cat of the Railway Train! In the watches of the night I was always fresh and bright; Every now and then I'd have a cup of tea With perhaps a drop of Scotch while I was busy keeping on the watch, Only stopping here and there to catch a flea. They were fast asleep at Crewe and so they never knew That I was walking up and down the station; They were sleeping all the while I was busy at Carlisle, Where I met the stationmaster with elation. They might see me at Dumfries, where I summoned the police If there was anything they ought to know about: When they got to Gallowgate there they did not have to wait - For Skimbleshanks will help them to get out! And he gives you a wave of his long brown tail Which says, 'I'll see you again! You'll meet without fail on the Midnight Mail The Cat of the Railway Train.' You'll meet without fail on the Midnight Mail The Cat of the Railway Train! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [5] Macavity 6:59 * A third crash interrupts the celebration, and this time the villainous * Macavity appears! Two of his henchman invade the proceedings and * kidnap Old Deuteronomy! Two felines familiar with Macavity, Demeter (a * frightened kitten who had been previously abducted by Macavity) and * the older and more sensual Bombalurina (a goodtime girl who gets along * with everyone) sing what they know of "Macavity" ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Macavity! Macavity's a Mystery Cat: he's called the Hidden Paw - For he's a master criminal who can defy the Law. He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair: For when they reach the scene of crime - Macavity's not there! Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity, He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity. His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare, And when you reach the scene of crime - Macavity's not there! You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air - But I tell you once and once again, Macavity's not there! Macavity's a ginger cat, he's very tall and thin; You would know him if you saw him, for his eyes are sunked in. His brow is deeply lined in thought, his head is highly domed; His coat is dusty from neglect, his whiskers are uncombed. He sways his head from side to side, with movements like a snake; And when you think he's half asleep, he's always wide awake. Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity, For he's a fiend in feline shape, a monster of depravity. You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in the square - But when a crime's discovered, then Macavity's not there! He's outwardly respectable. I know he cheats at cards. And his footprints are not found in any files of Scotland Yard's. And when the larder's looted, or the jewel-case is rifled, Or when the milk is missing, or another Peke's been stifled, Or the greenhouse glass is broken, and the trellis past repair - There's the wonder of the thing! Macavity's not there! And when the Foreign Office find a Treaty's gone astray, Or the Admiralty lose some plans and drawings by the way, There may be a scrap of paper in the hall or on the stair - But it's useless to investigate - Macavity's not there! And when the loss has been disclosed, the Secret Service say: 'It must have been Macavity!' - but he's a mile away. You'll be sure to find him resting, or a-licking on his thumbs, Or engaged in doing complicated long division sums. Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity There never was a Cat of such deceitfulness and suavity. He always has an alibi, and one or two to spare: What ever time the deed took place - Macavity wasn't there! And they say that all the Cats whose wicked deeds are widely known (I might mention Mungojerrie, I might mention Griddlebone) Are nothing more than agents for the Cat who all the time Just controls the operations: the Napoleon of Crime! Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity, He's a fiend in feline shape, a monster of depravity. You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in the square - But when a crime's discovered, then Macavity's not there! * Macavity returns, disguised as Old Deuteronomy, but he is revealed, * and he battles with Munkustrap and the other male cats. Tired and almost * defeated, Macavity rigs an electrical explosion that puts out all the * lights, leaving the Jellicles in the dark. We have to find Old Deuteronomy ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [6] Mr. Mistoffolees 3:37 * The Rum Tum Tugger calls in "Mr. Mistoffelees," the original * "conjuring cat" * to use his magical powers to bring back their leader. Mistoffelees * succeeds in getting back all of the lights, relocating Old * Deuteronomy, and showing off his magic tricks, including his infamous * "conjuring turn." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- You ought to ask Mr. Mistoffolees! The Original Conjuring Cat - (There can be no doubt about that). Please listen to me and don't scoff. All his Inventions are off his own bat. There's no such Cat in metropolis; He holds all the patent monopolies For performing surprising illusions And creating eccentric confusions. At prestidigitation And at legerdemain He'll defy examination And decieve you again The greatest magicians have something to learn From Mister Mistoffolees' Conjuring Turn Presto! And we'll all say: Oh! Well I never! Was there ever A Cat so clever As magical Mr. Mistoffolees! Oh! Well I never! Was there ever A Cat so clever As magical Mr. Mistoffolees! He is quiet and small, he is black From the ears to the tip of his tail; He can creep through the tiniest crack He can walk on the narrowest rail. He can pick any card from a pack, He is equally cunning with dice; He is always deceiving you into believing That he's only hunting for mice. He can play any trick with a cork Or a spoon and a bit of fish-paste; If you look for a knife or a fork And you think it is merely misplaced - You have seen it one moment, and then it's gone!! But you'll find it next week lying out on the lawn. And we all say: Oh! Well I never! Was there ever A Cat so clever As magical Mr. Mistoffolees! Presto! Oh! Well I never! Was there ever A Cat so clever As magical Mr. Mistoffolees! His manner is vague and aloof, You would think there was nobody shyer - But his voice has been heard on the roof When he was curled up by the fire. And he's sometimes been heard by the fire When he was about on the roof - (At least we all heard that somebody purred) Which is uncontestable proof Of his singular magical powers: And I've known the family to call Him in from the garden for hours, When he was asleep in the hall. And not long ago this phenomenal Cat Produced seven kittens right out of a hat! And we all say: Oh! Well I never! Was there ever A Cat so clever As magical Mr. Mistoffolees! People marvel! Oh! Well I never! Was there ever A Cat so clever As magical Mr. Mistoffolees! Magical Mr. Mistoffolees! Oh! Well I never! Was there ever A Cat so clever As magical Mr. Mistoffolees! You'll never believe it, you'll never believe it! Oh! Well I never! Was there ever A Cat so clever As magical Mr. Mistoffolees! This cat defies belief! Oh! Well I never! Was there ever A cat so clever As magical Mr. Mistoffolees! Can you believe this? Before your own eyes! Oh! Well I never! Was there ever A cat so clever As magical Mr. Mistoffolees! Ladies and gentlemen, I give you The magical The marvellous Mr. Mistoffolees! Presto! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [7] Memory 5:15 * At last, the time has come for Old Deuteronomy to make the Jellicle * Choice and decide which one cat will be reborn into a new Jellicle * life. At that moment, Grizabella reappears. Again she recalls her * "Memory" of how things used to be. She pleads to her brothers and * sisters, yearning to come back to them. This time, through a greater * appreciation of tolerance, the cats accept her back into the tribe. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Daylight See the dew on the sunflower And a rose that is fading Roses wither away Like the sunflower I yearn to turn my face to the dawn I am waiting for the day Now Old Deuteronomy just before dawn Through a silence you feel you could cut with a knife Announces the Cat who can now be reborn And come back to a different Jellicle Life. Memory Turn your face to the moonlight Let your memory lead you Open up, enter in If you find there the meaning of what happiness is Then a new life will begin Midnight Not a sound from the pavement Has the moon lost her memory She is smiling alone In the lamplight the withered leaves collect at my feet And the wind begins to moan Every street lamp seems to beat a fatalistic warning Someone mutters and the streetlamp gutters And soon it will be morning Memory All alone in the moonlight I can smile at the old days I was beautiful then I remember the time I knew what happiness was Let the memory live again Burnt out ends of smokey days The stale cold smell of morning The streetlamp dies, another night is over Another day is dawning Daylight I must wait for the sunrise I must think of a new life And I mustn't give in When the dawn comes tonight will be a memory too And a new day will begin Sunlight, through the trees in summer Endless masquerading Like a flower as the dawn is breaking The memory is fading Touch me, it's so easy to leave me All alone with my memory Of my days in the sun If you touch me you'll understand what happiness is Look, a new day has begun ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [8] The Journey to the Heaviside Layer 3:37 * It is she who is then chosen to journey to the "Heavyside Layer" and * be reborn! On a magical tire, Old Deuteronomy escorts Grizabella up to * the "Heaviside Layer". ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Up up up past the Russell Hotel, Up up up up to the Heaviside Layer. Up up up past the Russell Hotel, Up up up up to the Heaviside Layer. Up up up past the Russell Hotel, Up up up up to the Heaviside Layer. Up up up past the Russell Hotel, Up up up up to the Heaviside Layer. Up up up past the Jellicle Moon, Up up up up to the Heaviside Layer. Up up up past the Jellicle Moon, Up up up up to the Heaviside Layer. The mystical divinity of unashamed felinity Round the cathedral rang 'Vivat' Life to the everlasting cat! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [9] The Ad-dressing of Cats 5:12 * The Jellicle Ball has come to a conclusion, but first Old Deuteronomy * instructs the human spectators in the ad-dressing of cats. And thus * ends the annual celebration of cats! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- You've heard of several kinds of Cat, And my opinion now is that You should need no interpreter To understand our character. You've learned enough to take the view That Cats are very much like you And other people whom we find Posessed of various types of mind. For some are sane and some are mad And some are good and some are bad And some are better, some are worse - But all may be described in verse. You've seen us both at work and games, And learnt about our proper names, Our habits and our habitat: But how would you ad-dress a Cat? So first, your memory I'll jog, And say: A Cat is not a Dog. Now Dogs pretend they like to fight; They often bark, more seldom bite; But yet a Dog is, on the whole, What you would call a simple soul. Of course I'm not including Pekes, And such fantastic canine freaks. The usual Dog about the Town Is much inclined to play the clown, And far from showing to much pride Is frequently undignified. He's very easily taken in - Just chuck him underneath the chin Or slap his back or shake his paw, And he will gambol and guffaw. He's such and easy-going lout, He'll answer any hail or shout. The usual Dog about the Town Is much inclined to play the clown, Again I must remind you that A Dog's a Dog - A Cat's a Cat! With Cats, some say, one rule is true: Don't speak til you are spoken to. Myself, I do not hold with that - I say, you should ad-dress a Cat. But always keep in mind that he Resents familiarity. You bow, and taking off your hat, Ad-dress him in this form: O Cat! Before a Cat will condescend To treat you as a trusted friend, Some little token of esteem Is needed, like a dish of cream; And you might now and then supply Some caviare, or Straussburg Pie, Some potted grouse, or salmon paste - He's sure to have his personal taste. And so in time you reach your aim, And call him by his Name So this is this, and that is that: And there's how you Ad-dress a Cat. A Cat's entitled to expect These evidences of respect. So this is this, and that is that: And there's how you Ad-dress a Cat! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- =================================CURTAIN======================================= Track breakdown is for the CD released by The Really Useful Company, Inc. The Comprehensive Lyrics are gathered from: T. S. Eliot's books, The Original Broadway Lyrics, The Original London Lyrics, Listening to the CD, Watching the Movie. Scene descriptions are from some file I found on WWW, forgot where. Assembled and typed by Sergei Zubkov, cubbi@comp.chem.msu.su